I used to think drinking wine could help me fall asleep at night. Don’t get me wrong, if one bottle of Cabernet doesn’t knock me out - two will definitely get the job done. After one glass of wine, I naturally crave another glass. I call it the “thrill of the chase” or no self-control (the latter makes me sound alcoholic). The second glass is where it starts to get me energetic. So scratch off the wine - below are five unusual ways I inadvertently discovered to increase my mood of falling asleep.
1. Drink (Shitty) Coffee
Whenever I drink shitty coffee and any coffee with milk - I get coffee coma. I’m not a coffee expert, but all I know is when I drink from the Starbucks machine in the common lounge downstairs - I just want to pass out after. The fatigue kicks in fast even if I wait until the scientifically best time to drink coffee, although I did notice the later in the day I have coffee - the sleepier I get. Few of my friends recommended that I drink “Bulletproof Coffee” (black coffee + MCT/coconut oil + grass-fed butter) to avoid caffeine crash. So as a self-reminder - I will not touch that - if my goal is to fall asleep.
2. Rant To My Mom
If I ever need to rant about anything to anyone, my mom is my absolute last resort. I will make damn sure that I’ve already ranted to every single person I could possibly find in my phone contact, and then decide if I should tell my mom in the hope of finding comfort. As expected, I rarely receive pep talk without it leading to a series of preaching and bitching. Once she starts going in circles nagging the shit out of me - I automatically go into hibernate mode. This strategy doesn’t require much effort.
3. Listen To My Sister Rant
My oldest sister sounds like a broken record (It’s okay, she doesn’t even know I have a blog). If I ever not pick up my phone, it’s usually from her. I realized there are three types of people that will call you:
Type A just wants your advice.
Type B just wants you to listen.
Type C just wants to talk for the sake of talking.
She’s Type C - the most annoying one. She goes against everything I have to say and won't listen. I imagine putting a tape across her mouth or hang up the phone, but instead, I could only punch my pillow. The feeling of being trapped in a never-ending monologue conversation is guaranteed to put anyone to sleep.
4. Go To The Gym After 7 PM
Yeah right. After a long day, I will only binge-watch Black Mirror and indulge in Jeni’s ice cream. By the way, the Salted Peanut Butter with Chocolate Flecks flavor is to live for (not to “die” for because if I die, how can I possibly eat it again - duh). I don’t understand how some people can get all pumped up for an intense workout. For me, I get amped up when someone likes my Instagram pictures. Don’t get me wrong, I like working out during the day, but the thought of going to the gym after 7 pm really helps motivate me to go to bed.
5. Dwell On Something Really Embarrassing
Dwelling on really embarrassing moments is not fun at all - it requires more mental energy than deciding on what to eat for dinner every day. I usually try to shift my focus by singing. Ugh no, I’m not singing to A Whole New Word (using this as an example because I only know the lyrics to this song by heart). I just go “Lalala” repeatedly to hinder those obsessive thoughts from reoccurring in my head. It's such a strenuous process to overcome embarrassment - especially coming from someone super prideful like me. Hence, I just want to sleep and forget about it all.
If you have any unusual experiences that have successfully put you in a sleepy mood - feel free to leave a comment below. The weirder - the better. Bye! ;)